Some of you might know the unfortunate suicide in the student's dormitory a couple of months ago. I made light of the situation -much to my shame now- scorning weak-minded people.
I started huddling myself just now at scenes on TV of Wenchuan, broke out into sobbing, and there was no voice in the room to tell me what my life's been about. Clawing my way out of the state, I was dazed, as if I had just escaped a narrow death, jumping out of the tracks just before the train bore down on me. Loneliness is so scary and intangible, hits you without warning. Nothing I've done this week has led to this incident, just another sucker punch that will turn into a blip in -what I now hope to be- a long, long lifetime.
Fuck that was some scary shit.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
be a man! =)
ReplyDelete